Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Major Major

Rated R - Adult content, reader discretion adviced.

Last night, my friend was complaining about his neighbors. He is unable to sleep at night, thanks to the couple who moved in recently to the apartment right next to his. He regularly hear them screaming and groaning and thumping their bed against his wall in the middle of the night.

That reminded me of a camp we attended in Allahabad. We were in an Army base and were housed in barracks along with kids from around the country, around 50 of us. The barrack besides ours was occupied by our commanding officer, a stout, horny, rough looking army Major who might have been in his mid 40s.
After a long hot uneventful summer day, we had just gone to bed. I was so tired that I slept the moment I hit bed. Around midnight, I was awakened by the sounds of screaming ghosts. Alarmed I jumped and sat up right on my bed, so did my friend Satheesh who was sleeping next to me. Next thing we noticed the whole barrack is awake. First we thought somebody was crying and wondered if we needed to run out to help them, but as we listened more carefully we understood that no rescue mission was necessary. We were hearing the sounds of an enthusiastic woman having a wonderful time! “aaah…. aaaah…saaab… dheere se jaaneman …oooooh …Uff!”. This was accompanied by the rhythmic sound of a steel bed squeaking. The sound effects went on for a while before the commanding officer finally groaned “uhhhh mazza aaya ” and fired his ceremonial last shot. Then things became quite for a while.

I looked at Sathish. He looked at me. We smiled. We couldn’t believe what we had just witnessed – Remember we were just 17 years old then! Soon Sathish, being the funny bastard he is, opened the window and started clapping. I couldn't resist and followed suit. Soon the entire dorm was giving a standing ovation. We were applauding and cheering a job well done.

I think I should advice my friend to do the same and acknowledge his neighbors for their next show.

Monday, April 16, 2007


Posted some photos at Orkut.
Here is the link: