Elections in Kerala

With barely a week left for the results to be announced, I am keeping my fingers tightly crossed. A landslide victory for the left coalition, LDF, is a given. The uncertainty is about the Chief Minister. Will it be:
a. VS Achuthanandan, the ebullient and charismatic leader of the masses.
b. Pinaray Vijayan, the unglamorous and sleepy half brother of Wen Jiabao
c. Paloli Muhammed Kutti, the feckless but wise looking communist veteran.

I think a single person being the chief minister is a stale and ineffective proposition. It is time we experiment some new ‘positions’. How about the unambiguously gay duo of VS and Pinaray both become chief ministers. To assuage the Malabari population, we could even have a threesome; milkman Muhammad Kutti can join the orgy and play a whip lashing dominatrix virago. Instead of the chief minister’s chair, we could consider having a large king sized comfort bed.

It might work. Vijayan’s “young” blood and VS’s reactionary venal sap may blend well, with a pinch of Palolian salt. Politics, for the common man, is after all alchemy. They don’t know if their political experimentation will yield glittering gold or just toxic fumes. Like the old alchemists, people are passionate about their experiment. Although they complain about politicians, they go wild and crazy on election day. They run to polling stations with out brushing their teeth, or feeding their kids, or even having their regular 50 ml of fine single malt arrack. Some of them even camp outside the booths the night before! The hardcore ones hang out at the poling stations much after the electoral officers have left, without food, or water but with a fervent piety that will eclipse the zealous devotion of vote seeking candidates themselves.

Personally I don’t have a predilection. VS is a bit too diehard and backward thinking. But he seems to care more. Apparently he has a clean image too, except for the allegations against his son. Pinary, on the other hand is touted as an extremely corrupt politician. He belongs to the class of Kunjali, Mani, Murali and Balakrishna Pillai. I frankly don’t know much about the third candidate, milk man Gandhi. So there you have it. I resign to my state of having my fingers crossed.

Note: I predict VS will be the CM, but Pinary and his men (who will make up most of the ministers) will run the show.